Words

Familiar Phrases

Posted on by lainamunoz

For your listening enjoyment while reading: No Longer Slaves

At Team Night this week I told G-d that I was done doing things for Him. I am done waking up early to do devotionals and I’m done with Leadership College. I’m done attending and serving at church for Him. I’m done striving to do what I can to make sure that when I’m 50 I’m still faithfully serving. Why?

Because this whole gig isn’t working for me.

So I sat. I didn’t tell Him that I was done in the context of ‘Stuff You, this is isn’t something I want to be apart of’ but, I sat there telling G-d I was done because it’s exhausting to try to work for grace. It actually accomplishes nothing. My personality type is a ‘doer’ I want to accomplish things and find an organized approach to make sure that no one sits in a pointless meeting longer than they ever have to.

I forget something so special when I live in fear that if I don’t wake up and read and write every morning that somehow I no longer have the Spirit actively with me. Or if I forgot about Him for a moment I maybe somehow would have a day where I wasn’t being used for anything worthwhile.

“You need to trust His ability to LEAD you more than your ability to follow Him.”

My faithfulness is no reflection of His.

Teamnight was all about songs, the ones we sing to connect to G-d, confess truth of who He is and who we are, and the song that G-d sings over us (Zep. 3:17). So I asked G-d if I could listen in. I wanted to know what G-d was singing over me. It blew my mind when I felt like He was responding with something already dear to my heart, “His banner over me is love”. I don’t know another person or thing on earth that knows what the melody of love is, but He does. He resonated that in my heart and it felt as if my heart responded to the familiar chorus. My mom used to sing a song to me ages ago with those lyrics (His Banner Over me Is Love – I could have found a better version… but these outfits! I also found it extremely appropriate that it was children singing)

Almost everything in my walk with G-d has something to do with Grace, my sister. As we sang No Longer Slaves and proclaimed “I am a child of G-d” over and over, I thought about what it truly means to be a child of someone. I don’t DO things for my parents to get them to love me, in fact I’m sure I’ve done things that would give them every right not to love me but they still do. I think about morning cuddles and that wonderful age of 2-4 years when you just run up to your parents and throw your hands above your head and wait to feel weightless. I’ve never been super emotional or sentimental but at no point in my life do I remember not just waiting for Gracie to throw her arms up towards me. It overwhelms you with love for these little squishy beings when they CHOOSE you. You feel cooler than the other people in the room when they throw a fit until YOU pick them up.

Guys, I shamelessly go on and on about my sister frequently because my heart actually has never understood more of G-d’s love than when I think about her. I legitimately ACHE when I think about how much I love her… and shoot, she’s not even my kid. But a long time ago I asked for something tangible from G-d to understand His love, He gave me grace… and He gave me Grace. And if I don’t even fully understand how much parents love their kids then this is just the beginning of G-d’s love… like the VERY VERY small and humble beginnings.

How great is His love?

“I am surrounded by the arms of a Father

I am surrounded by songs of deliverance”

At this point in the evening I might have started crying at the thought of my sister and the thought of me being G-d’s child, I couldn’t even process or express how much I loved her and then I got a nudge in my Spirit, “I love you more”. Again, my mom used to say this phrase to me (and still does via 9,000 miles of iMessaging). More than I love anything on earth, He loves me MORE (than I understand). G-d knows how to get my attention.

I love you more
I cannot fathom the depths

I sat after telling G-d I was done working for something I already had, and was just there, listening to this song I left up at the top for you all. The bridge starts to sing;

“You split the sea so I could walk right through it,

you drowned my fear in perfect love”

I stood, letting go of the fear that somehow if I didn’t DO something to get His attention I wouldn’t have it. I lifted my hands knowing that He couldn’t leave me there.

((He always picks me up.

((His grace is always enough.

((I am a child of G-d

(Travel) Back Thursday

Posted on by lainamunoz

Today in class we were challenged to tell the person next to us why we are here. We were asked to remember the reason that we came to college. It has been a great breath of fresh air this week to think on the season that led up to moving to Australia – G-d was doing great things, Oklahoma was the kindest it had ever been to me, I felt closer to my family than I ever had and it was time to leave.

I can’t honestly remember why I was on a plane in January other than the trip here but I wrote this while trying to avoid overthinking. Please enjoy!

#ThinkBackThursday

Flights are annoying, and boring, and lonely. You have to turn your phone onto airplane mode and just sit. I play Sudoku but eventually that gets frustrating. You can read or write depending on how much space you have to move your elbow from one side of the seat back tray to the other. But mostly, you’re left to be with your own thoughts and feelings. You think about the last time you flew, where you went, what trips you have coming up and so on and so forth. If you’re smart you brought snacks. Thought exploration is exhausting.

      “Here it’s You and me alone G-d, You and me alone.”

Learning how to be alone is going to take me time… I enjoyed being alone once upon a time, for a season. But now as I have been out of that season for a bit of time I don’t really enjoy loads of “alone”. I find time spent with people more valuable and enjoyable because frankly, I’m pretty happy right now and I don’t want to learn sometimes – because I don’t like correction.

So, here I am. It’s a baby flight compared to the 17 hour one I have ahead of me but it’s a good reminder and starter for what I have to look forward to.

Alone time.

I’ve been praying for a family when I get to Australia already. I group of parents that will call me their own and let me cry on their couch when I miss my bloodline; A mom and dad that will possibly let me adopt a puppy under their care (wishful thinking). A couple that will care for me and invite me over for Sunday dinners, a counselor to talk to. There are people in my own life currently that model what they do well. These are positions in my life I don’t care to live without… I’m too old to care if my roommates like me or not. I just need a family to care for me. I am NOT an adult.

I have already started praying for the young girls I will live with (I have an odd feeling they will be young), for their growth while they are there and for their hearts as they take a few years to adventure into education. I’ve already begun to pray for my professors and faculty that they don’t mind my brashness and attitude I tend to write and live with. I don’t know who will be picking me up from the airport but I’ve already begun to pray for them too.

I don’t believe in coincidence anymore. There will be a reason behind my conversations with people, and Lord willing, He’ll maybe use me to draw out things people don’t see in themselves. And may it begin when I am alone… May it start on my plane ride there, with the patient people sitting to my right and to my left as I cry my way from Tulsa to Texas and onto Sydney. I’ve had too many “random choices” that led to G-d moments with random people to think when I walk it isn’t on purpose. When I wake up in the morning it is for no other reason that G-d allowing me to be apart of someone’s story. To show them a little more of the Creators heart wrapped up into who they already are.

If you collect me from the airport that first day in Sydney, know I was praying for you. Future housemates, I hope G-d wrecks you in whatever time we have together at Hillsong. Absolutely levels your foundation and rebuilds and fortifies who you are (whoever you might be). I hope you fight with me, I hope you cry with me, I hope you learn how to share with me and be real with me, I hope you learn how to heal as I learn this walking in healing. I hope we laugh together to the point of tears and spend a few hours exhausting the “next episode” button on Netflix. I’m leaving it in G-d’s hands which makes it more exciting than I can stand.

Teachers… I hope you don’t fail me. (haha, kinda serious though)… I hope you understand what I’ve learned from childhood to now is to be bold about who I am and if you don’t agree I typically don’t care. If you’re right then I’ll learn eventually. And I will admit it to you. But I am already praying what you teach is fully absorbed by my little ol’ self. I want to be a student to the fullest and give you back as much time in my work as what you’ve put into educating us. You are valuable and will be a life changing person for me. Even if I think your class is dumb.

((I hope I don’t have to take any dumb classes.

For those who I’ve been forced to say farewell to and will have to say it to soon… I hope you know how dearly you will be missed and I hope you know how excited I am to leave you. I love having conversations with a lot of you (some of you all are more of a challenge) and I love downloading and learning from you. I am excited to sharpen my skills and thoughts and come back and learn again what G-d has done in your lives and share what He has done in mine. I’m excited to miss you because it’ll make the reunion hug that much more squishy.

Squishy hugs rule.

Reunions are beautiful.

And my friends are freaking great.

So, as I prepare for the flight and the time I have to be alone just know… I’ll probably spam your Facebook with writing. I’d apologize but I really like writing and if you don’t like reading then don’t click on the links 🙂 If you do like reading, be my friend. This is how I process and learn I’m excited to see what there is to see and meet people that will become my adoptive family for a season… And if I get a puppy in the next year I’m gonna freak out 🙂 Thanks for reading if you actually took the time.

I have love for you all.

The Heart of a Child

Posted on by lainamunoz

I wrote this when I was 18 years old, which would have made Gracie about 4 years old at the time. Also making her the cutest ever. Also making this a #ThinkBackThursday…

Pardon my love for ellipses at the time(…)

Enjoy!

Whatever you write on the heart of a child
No water can wash away
The sand may be shifted when billows are wild
And the efforts of time may decay
Some stories may parish, some songs may be forgotten
But this graven record—time changes it not
Whatever you write on the heart of a child
A story of gladness or care
That heaven has blessed or earth defiled
Will linger unchangeable there…
-Author, Unknown

“And if anyone causes one of these little ones who believe in me to sin, it would be better for him to be thrown into the sea with a large millstone tied around his neck.”//“Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.”

For anyone on the brink of being a parent, who has been a parent, or who works with kids of any age: realize the gift and responsibility that has been given to you.

G-d not only gives children for the purpose of raising but instructing and to personally keep YOURSELF in check…

Storytime!

One fine, freezing Monday afternoon an Ice storm hit Owasso, OK. At the time I was at church working with Kevin, Kara, Nich and Francyne (Frankie). Nich and Frankie live in Catoosa (roughly 45 minutes away from Owasso) and the roads had already gotten too slick to drive safely home for them, so they stayed at my house. The next day was filled with quality time with them and my baby sister Gracie. Gracie and I LOVE making cookies so, Frankie, Gracie and I start making our homemade chocolate chip cookies. Francyne and I both LOVE McAlisters Deli cookies because they usually (more often than not) under bake them so that the middle is still a very soft almost cookie-type cookie dough (AMAZING).
So in honor of being stuck at home and wanting that good ol’ comfort food we under bake a batch just enough to satisfy mine and Frankie’s taste.  🙂

All of the cookies are done and cooling on the table downstairs and the boys come down (what guy doesn’t come to the smell of food?) so downstairs at the table it was me, Grace, Francyne, My dad, and Nich (Vito might of been there too at this point)… I went to go for one of the under baked cookies with a lot of chocolate chips. I picked it up with both of my hands and ALL of my focus. Nich, being the loving co-worker and friend that he is decides to take my chair out from under me and I, in all faith and confidence sit down expecting the chair that I just got up from to be there. I land on my back. I was really alright with falling, no big deal… but when I looked up and realized that my cookie that I so carefully picked out was no longer in my hands I shout (in a joking voice) “I HATE you Nich!! I hate you!” I look around in a somewhat panic to find my cookie broken into two or so pieces and I pick it up, pout and make Nich eat it because it fell on the floor.

About this time while everyone is laughing at me falling, Gracie chimes in and says “Laina, you shouldn’t say you hate people…” at this point apologize and still laughing sort of brush the comment off; She continues “It hurts G-d’s feelings when you say Hate” Ouch… I slide back from the table and everyone at this point is in shock and laughter (Francyne was crying she was laughing so hard) because hearing something like that from a 4 1/2 year old isn’t exactly common. Everyone is laughing and we all semi-collect ourselves back to the table. I apologize once more and take a huge sigh and say “I’m sorry Gracie but that was really funny” and she replies “Yeah, that was really funny when Nich pulled your chair out from under you”

….Gotta love the mind track of 4 year olds.

This was possibly one of the funniest things that has ever happened to me and also one of the most spiritually convicting.

The idea of having “Child-like faith”

It’s an innocents I wish I still had.

Words such as “crap”, “dang”, “stupid”, “hate” are all words that coming out of a child’s mouth you’d cringe to hear. But why does the standard change just because you’re older and you’ve put in your time? Do you somehow earn the right at a particular age to say whatever you want? What you say around children will not be forgotten. Gracie is 4 and absorbs anything and everything she hears. I thank G-d and my parents for teaching her that life is about being polite and honest and keeping your speech at a standard that pleases G-d. To this day I watch more than ever what I say because I didn’t even think about Gracie being in the room. To tell the truth I didn’t even think about saying “hate” …no harm no foul?
However, the harm in the situation is not being sensitive to the fact that not only was I in the presence of a child, I was in the presence of G-d and HE monitors more than just my speech, He guards my heart and spirit. The Bible says the Word of G-d even separates bones and marrow. G-d gets to the nitty gritty of faith and gives a black and white of what life should be.

Why is any of this story Important?

“I tell you the truth, unless you change and become like little children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.” — Matthew 18.3

If you don’t become like little children, you WILL NEVER enter heaven. What better way to learn how to be a child that from a child? Next time you’re around a young person watch what you say and instead of trying to get them to learn to read or add or multiply or any of that, why don’t you just observe what exactly they have that you’ve lost.

He’s Faithful To My Heart…

Posted on by lainamunoz

I began my Wednesday morning this week as per usual at Gloria Jeans with my housemate for our coffee, catch up and read up time. We had a great time. 

Fast forward to just shortly before chapel started around 11:45am… I get a text from my housemates asking if any of us could come home and help clean out the refrigerator because our landlords had popped in for a surprise ‘we’re-going-to-take-your-refrigerator’ party that they didn’t invite us to.

(It IS their refrigerator but notification to remove food and maybe not have just gone shopping and stocked up would have been lovely)

So there sat the refrigerated portion of my households food. No one knew what was going on or where we were going to put all of this food.

My brain immediately went reeling through all of my food safety training. I was mentally sorting out where we were going to fit all of the meat and spoilable things that really needed to be cold. Mostly I was pissed and shocked at our landlords lack of understanding for all of my food safety concerns for all of the waste that would soon become of our food if we didn’t get the proper air temperature control box device to monitor the longevity of our edibles.

(guys, wasted money on food and spoiled food gets under my skin #ChilisForLife)

So, I prayed, I vented to G-d and told Him how unpleased this situation left my heart feeling. I then texted my parents. I asked them to pray for wisdom, peace and a free refrigerator. I also prayed for these things. I fumed a little bit through chapel all whilst reminding my household that it would all be alright.

The ‘fix it’ mode that I was operating in blocked off my memory from memor’ing* a meeting that I had set up with a friend until he called me as I was walking home. I apologized and explained that we needed to reschedule because I needed to get a house jam sorted. He asked me what was up and I explained in less words the story that you just read. Without another breath he responded, ‘wait let me call my friend she had some extra refrigerators I’m sure she could get you one!’.

What?

G-d what?

I know that I’ve heard that prayer works and I know that I even believe that prayer works but G-d, you aren’t messing around. Within the evening we picked up our new refrigerator.

The following day at Sisterhood I was reminded of a verse that in many seasons of my life I’ve held dearly:

Philippians 4:6-7 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

I got to experience the entirety of this verse within the time span of chapel. I threw it to G-d and He did not disappoint. One thing I keep coming back to is His faithfulness… Guys, it’s SO big!

The resounding sentence I’ve had stuck in my heart is that, I’ve never lived a day that the sun didn’t rise. If that isn’t a display of the faithfulness of G-d than you must be a scientist or some non-science (see what I did there?)

Point of the story: Pray, and watch to see what G-d does.  

Nike

Posted on by lainamunoz

Please enjoy this #ThinkBackThursday from 2011! It was composed in regards to a writing project that I had started and took my sweet time finishing. Whilst forgetting what the timeline even looked like for my project I had to remind myself that sometimes it isn’t about passion, it’s about consistency and commitment. It’s about doing it anyway and following through… It’s about just doing it.

I’ve thought a lot about writing over these few weeks (month or so) and I’m finding that while thinking about things is nice, it takes effort to do them. For me right now – it takes getting over myself because I don’t want to write at this point. It’s been a long season; a very long season. I don’t want to learn even though I still am everyday, I don’t want to realize all the areas where I’m wrong.

I’m just a stubborn human who is fighting constantly against everything that I am.

What I’m finding is that G-d is there, even when I don’t think He is or when I don’t want Him to be. He is an awesome G-d who protects me and loves me deeply… It is for Him that I started this project and for Him that I will finish. For His honor and nothing for myself.

This isn’t much but it’s a start. It’s a day. It’s a step.

In time I will finish my task, I will end my day, and I will complete my journey.

                        But I have to start somewhere.

Many Thanks! Sincerely, Jane and Michael Banks

Posted on by lainamunoz

People Appreciation Post

Thank you is all I have to give but I feel like it is an unlimited resource (or that it SHOULD be). I’ve seen immense acts of service in my life and the only thing I can do is say thank you.

Thank you to my parents who I wouldn’t be here without. I wouldn’t be WHO I AM without you both and I’m unbelievably blessed and thankful that you are both married to each other. Your marriage and communication skills entertain me (in the best way). Thank you to my brother who shows me constantly what it is to have a friend that will always be there. You protect me often and correct me even more. You’re one of the few I trust to call me out and even when you can’t stand me I know you’ll stand by me and I know that you love me.

Thank you to Gracie who has shown me and continues to show me how big love can really be; who has challenged my view of G-d more times than she will likely realize until she has children of her own.

I know you aren’t my baby.

But you’re my baby.

Get over it.

Thank you to anyone who has financially blessed me in coming and staying in Australia. Truly your gifts have changed the very structure and reception of my heart. You’ve not only let me see G-d’s hand out working but you’ve placed so much more weight into how I view myself.

There are no words to thank the people who believe in you.

It gives you super-powers.

To Katie, I’ve never had someone stick as fiercely or for as long as you. Your opinions and convictions and joy have shaped a large portion of my brain and heart and doing life with you is always painfully funny. Our seasons and locations don’t always align but currently we both live in Australia and that’s pretty cool. I actually have no idea what life will look like with us in the same country again but I’m already too excited to articulate. You deserve a better, wiser, more fashionable friend – but you got me. Thanks for keeping me in check and asking the hard questions.

(Shout out for being my gym buddy again and lookin’ HAWT – you get to be the feature pic today!)

My housemates, I can’t clump you guys together because you are ALL so different but you’ve all shown me so much this last 8 months on how to live with community that you can’t escape. (It’s a good thing). You’ve all shown me how to give and receive when I need. You’ve given me a space to create in and the challenge to do so. You’ve allowed me to cry and dance and encouraged me when I felt like I wasn’t in the right place.

You’ve all taught me the benefits of keeping butter around for impromptu brownie baking so that we might all stand in the kitchen and talk about boys and how much we need to work out. I wouldn’t be the same person without you girls.

And to way too many friends here in tutorial and classes and leaders that I have – I’ve learned (and I’m still learning) to live a little more openly. I’ve been given an opportunity to rely on you all and live without a guard and allow this process to happen. I’ve been trusted with more than I feel I can accomplish and yet also the encouragement that I can.

In the words of Kid President “Things We Should Say More Often”:

THANK YOU!

(ref. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m5yCOSHeYn4 )

((I want to meet this kid… #LifeGoals))

I wish you all understand the heart behind what I write and why, I actually ache sometimes to get my point across. I wish you all understand the awe I have over what I’ve been blessed to do and who I’ve been blessed to love. I am so thankful for the beautiful life that I have (even when it isn’t actually all that beautiful) and it wouldn’t be fair to allow you all to read these every week (or every month) ((or once a year)) without telling you all how much it really means to me that you do.

Concluding thoughts… Maybe say ‘thank you’ to someone where it’s overdue or maybe where it is right on time.

www.gofundme.com/storytimewithlaina

If you will pray for me or feel it in your heart to give or maybe you want to pass the link along.
All I have is thanks but I pray that will always be enough.

It’s More Of A Prayer

Posted on by lainamunoz

Sometimes I miss my Merge team… sometimes I miss my band.

Please enjoy this simple #ThinkBackThursday

It’s more of a prayer

Let me be apart of something beautiful.

You have people that you surround yourself with that you just feel better being around. Cherish the moments with them because somewhere inside you know that 1- They won’t be in your life forever (at least physically there) and 2- You have a deep pride when you think about them because you see what they will be.

They are world shakers.

They are the ones who when faced with impossible tasks show you that they have more to them. They are the people who if you think about long enough you just want to give more time, energy, investments and attention. They are creative and challenging they make mistakes and figure out how to keep going. They inspire you and many around them and most of the time they don’t see it.

They are the creators of precious moments that you wish would last a lifetime. They are sunset personalities and when their season in your life is over you are upset, but realize something new is coming.

They are just there for a season, for a day, for a moment and then gone. But you never forget them. You never belittle their impact on your life. They are friends and family, they are people you encounter in the workplace and school and driving, they are artists and the homeless they are travelers and hippies. They are your mom, your dad, your brother and sister; and in those moments, those beautiful moments, you see clearly that it’s not about you. It’s nothing you can do on your own – it’s life and it is meant to be shared with someone, with many someone’s; to experience pain and victory together.

Life is a beautiful thing even when it’s not.

G-d, bless the painfully surreal moments in my life.

I-N-D-E-P-E-N-D-E-N-T // Do You Know What That Means?

Posted on by lainamunoz

The more I wake up the more I need Jesus. The closer I am to Him the more I need Him closer still. I’ve chatted with my roommate a few times about this and maybe even mentioned it in my writing that occasionally (and for no valid reason) I feel like a bad Christian, or a bad college student, or like I’m somehow doing life wrong. Know that I’ve identified them as my mental battle and I know that those things aren’t true or how G-d sees me but I’m still aware daily of how much grace I require to be alive.

I’ve grown up for the most part with an independent spirit, which can absolutely kill the church.

I’m not blessing anyone by being alone and standoffish towards my community and friends. It is for this reason that I am learning how to live in constant communication and calling out to G-d to teach me how to live with people and give to people with all of me. Honestly, the less it’s about me or I think about me or rely on me the better my life gets. Sometimes it can seem a little scarier but the reward of having a group of people to do life with is proving to be the greatest journey I’ve been on. I actually ENJOY learning how to communicate, have conflict, resolve things, have differing opinions and still treasure the human to their core. But I can’t do this community thing or love with out grace.

I can’t learn how to bless people without realizing how much I need Jesus to do it; all because He blesses me.

Lately the phrase that has been echoing in my heart and both terrifying me and encouraging me is “Grow Your Capacity” to which my heart responds with a firm “how the cheese do I do that?” At some point this last week while thinking of all the logical ways I could grow my capacity and abilities I realize the only thing I can really do to grow is increase my dependency. I have a LOT of goals – I’m a task driven person, which can also drive me crazy. There is more to fit in a day than allotted hours and I still have to function as a relational human being with real college homework. I wonder sometimes if I have what it takes for the long haul and all conclusions I’ve come to is: no. I’m crazy and overthink and over plan and yet somehow when I wake up, love Jesus and do my best: He blesses the rest of it. I accomplish so much more when I’m not dependent on me.

G-d has been challenging me lately to kill my independence and live in dependence on everything that He is.

#HitUmWitDatScriptureTalk-
“You can easily enough see how this kind of thing works by looking no further than your own body. Your body has many parts—limbs, organs, cells—but no matter how many parts you can name, you’re still one body. It’s exactly the same with Christ. By means of his one Spirit, we all said good-bye to our partial and piecemeal lives. We each used to independently call our own shots, but then we entered into a large and integrated life in which he has the final say in everything. (This is what we proclaimed in word and action when we were baptized.) Each of us is now a part of his resurrection body, refreshed and sustained at one fountain—his Spirit—where we all come to drink. The old labels we once used to identify ourselves—labels like Jew or Greek, slave or free—are no longer useful. We need something larger, more comprehensive.
 I want you to think about how all this makes you more significant, not less. A body isn’t just a single part blown up into something huge. It’s all the different-but-similar parts arranged and functioning together. If Foot said, “I’m not elegant like Hand, embellished with rings; I guess I don’t belong to this body,” would that make it so? If Ear said, “I’m not beautiful like Eye, limpid and expressive; I don’t deserve a place on the head,” would you want to remove it from the body? If the body was all eye, how could it hear? If all ear, how could it smell? As it is, we see that God has carefully placed each part of the body right where he wanted it.” (1 Corinthians 12:12-18 MSG)

We all have our separate parts and functions but WE live inside of a body that SHOULD be encouraging one another and crying when WE feel loss. WE should be operating in our own personalities and callings TO BETTER ONE ANOTHER NOT BE BETTER THAN ONE ANOTHER. WE should be growing our capacities as to grow the Church.

So, I hope we begin to live fully and love deeply. I hope we begin to grow in dependence on each other and desperate for Christ. I hope you go with me towards this community of the Body and calling on the Savior in the daily.

Grow your capacity. Grow your dependency.

The Gift that Keeps on Giving

Posted on by lainamunoz

It’s just so good to remember HOW good G-d is. The beauty of who He is can be revealed in his many gifts that He blesses us with. I’m so thankful for His grace everyday.

Please enjoy this #ThinkBackThursday

14.08.2012

“For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith – and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of G-d – not by works, so that no one can boast.”

Ephesians 2.8-9

Birthday gifts are funny things; we receive them in a celebration of the day we were born. They aren’t given to return favors but almost as a, “congratulations, you didn’t die this year!”. We didn’t earn them nor do we by any means deserve them. This is the case with most any gifts we received.

Our salvation is a gift from G-d. Of all things to be ill-deserving of, He chose to give us eternal life and in that life all of our mistakes (the accidents and purposely rebellious things) are covered by grace. I don’t understand a LOT of things – “I don’t know” comes out of my mouth and is written by my pen more times than I could recall.

But how I understand grace is this: I’m alive today.

Despite going from a devotion yesterday morning straight to driving and bickering at all the morons who drive with less skill than I do, despite forgetting what I even read yesterday or sleeping through my alarm and missing Sunday school – I’m here and I’m given this moment to praise my King. I’m given this gift of salvation and (dare I say) “insight” into the kingdom that I might know the hope to which G-d has called me, the riches of His glory and His great power (Eph. 1.18-19)

If you take Christ and His sacrifice out of the equation, it’s likely that ink would have never filled this page. I’d never have been born, and my parents might not have met. Me alone without G-d leaves me dead in sin (Eph. 2.1) – a useless bag of gross that people should light on fire and leave on a porch somewhere.

Thinking of my life without G-d is awful.

LORD, Thank You for Salvation and Grace. Help me to fully realize how dependent I am on You and remind me daily of where I’d be without You. Your grace is a beautiful thing and though I don’t see or understand fully I am so grateful for this gift. Forgive me for all the time I waste and for how sinfully forgetful I am. Help me remember to reflect on and praise Your name and blessings.

I don’t understand why He chose a sinful man to pour all of this out on but He did; probably because He is just THAT wise. He not only handles our shortcomings but He can make them look like they were always in “The Plan”. He teaches us through our trials not around them.

“In Him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of Him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of His will.”

Ephesians 1.11

Who has two mighty hands and can work out EVERYTHING in conformity with the purpose of His will?!
G-d. That guy.

Everything. G-d, Creator of the Heavens and Earth picked us all first before any other creature offered on the little league team to be apart of His great plan. Not only were we chosen but we are given this Author who has the creativity that is beyond our favorite writers, painters, inventors and kindergarten teachers meshed together. We have a G-d who can move us into something of worth – even after our days filled with mistakes –  ALL for His will. And He actually KNOWS what He is doing.

Shewt.

Jesus, Your Word is true. I was dead in my sin and have been offered this salvation and grace and forgiveness and I want it. I’m going to hold You to Your word. Use my life and cover my shortcomings to allow me to fit into Your will. Help me to understand the hope You’ve called me to – in that give me rest. G-d, I’m not the brightest… can You remind me how much I need You? How much others need You and let my life be of some use for Your kingdom. Cause I know it’s ONLY by You that it could.

            I love you, talk to You soon.

OklaHomeSick: Mind, Body, Soul

Posted on by lainamunoz

About four weeks ago I specifically remember telling my friend Maggie, “No it’s ok I don’t really ever get sick I have a great immune system”. One week later I began showing signs of a cold or maybe a flu, I’m not sure but I was in fact sick. Loads of college students were sick so I didn’t think much of it other than the common cold was going around and sucks to suck now I’m sick too. I had a day of being in my bed wondering why the sun was shining if I felt so terrible followed by a few days of forcing myself to school with a bag full of cough drops to keep handy. I got better after 5 days or so but still had a cough and couldn’t breathe all that well. I believe it was about 2 days later when I got sick again.

I wasn’t able to serve or go to class without feeling light headed and I had to give up a pretty cool opportunity that I was excited about. I wasn’t able to do my normal routine of mornings at the coffee shop with Krysia or going to the gym or doing any extra activities. I finally went to the doctor after my lovely friend Maggie was diagnosed with Whooping Cough. I just had a sinus infection but I knew chances of it getting better on it’s own were slim to none with how Christmas-toned my mucus was. I’m feeling much better now and with the advice of my teacher purchased some nasal spray and antihistamines to take every day.

Something happened though in these last three weeks of being sick. I got homesick as well. There is nothing I want more when I don’t feel well than my big queen sized bed and a mommy who will bend over backwards to make sure I have all the soup, Cheez-its, Poweraid and Ice cream I need when I’m sick. My friends here did an incredible job and shout out to Krysia for making me some bomb soup to help me along the way. I just felt weak and wanted to be home.

It seems to always happen that way actually, when my physical body isn’t doing so well neither is my spirit person and in turn neither is my heart. I begin to break down when I’m sick and can’t fight the mental battles on my own. When I have no physical strength in my body it is very difficult to fight the spiritual battles as well. I began fighting feeling overwhelmed and not enough for what I was called to, I began to believe the lies that I didn’t fit in or look pretty enough or thin enough or strong enough to be who I know I am able to be. I’m not at all surprised that when I feel weak I mentally retreat back home. I retreat to the need for my bloodline and the strength in my family. I was sick and just wanted my mommy.

Maybe this is the reason we are commanded, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.” (Mark 12:30) G-d knew (because He created) how connected we were in our body, heart, soul, strength so much so that He knew if we were loving Him fully with one of these we’d be loving Him fully with all of these. We are intricate beings that are connected at every level within us. I can’t explain all of the science but I know that when its sunny out I’m typically happier and when I’m happier I’m more productive and feel better about what I accomplished that day. When I’m sick and its storming outside I’m proud of myself for getting out of bed. When I have the chance to work out consistently I feel a little bolder about who I am and the way I was created and when I’m taking care of myself I’m a little less insecure.

((When I’m sick it’s hard to fight.

I think this is also why we’re commanded to take care of our bodies, we aren’t loving Jesus well with them if we aren’t and if we aren’t loving well with our bodies, our spirit people suffer. We are so beautifully and wonderfully made. G-d knows what He is doing when He tells us to love and serve Him with all of us. We can’t serve with half or we really aren’t serving at all.