Christmas Time

So for the first 50 days of my #100daycreativechallenge I allowed myself to be a little lax in what I was creating. I did anything creative and a lot of days and would also write a small section of lyrics on my phone or something. I’ve kept up with my Instagram if you want to check out any of the days so far.

I’ve decided the last 50 days are to be dedicated to Songwriting. Today I had the honour of writing a Christmas Song with my BEAUTIFUL cousin Renee.

Here is a link to it!

Lyrics:

Hang your stocking and
Wrap your gifts cause it’s
Christmas time once again
////
Gather family and
Hold them tightly it’s
Christmas time once again
////
Sing it now sing it loudly
As angels gather around to hear
Hold your loved ones closer
For times like these can be so rare
////
Hark the Harold the
Angels sing now it’s
Christmas time once again
////
Come Emmanuel
Come and here the sound
It’s Christmas time once again

I won’t post each thing I do on here, I’ll just stick to insta, but feel free to share, join the challenge (a little info on it), follow or think through your life choices and the amount of creativity you’re producing 🙂

Happy Merry Christmas guys, love you all.

Fearfully and Wonderfully Terrified

This #ThinkBackThursday is brought to you by: Christmas Eve, Georgia, Family, and Fear.

Happy Merry Christmas Eve! 

Love you all!


So, my mom is in Kenya so I got to take over Gracie-Bath-Time duty, which brings me back to being a kid… I was terrified of the bath drain. I remember crying because of that wretched noise it would make as it was sucking the water down into total darkness. I was so scared that if I was anywhere near it I would get sucked down too. And so I would always hide between the toilet seat and the wall and cover my ears and try not to cry.

((Thank you Jesus for a creative imagination at a young age.

That wasn’t my only fear with baths and showers growing up; I also HATED washing my hair; not really the washing part but the part where I had to lean my head back and try to not mix the soapy water in my eyes. I was reminded of this fear tonight when I had to wash Gracie’s hair. She would squash her eyes tight shut and even when I was holding her head and telling her I had her and I needed her to lean back she had a very hard time with it.

Strange thing about all this is, its when we lean our heads back that we have the least likely chance to get soapy water in our eyes. We just can’t see that because we don’t have the perspective to see it. So what do we do? Sit in a bathtub with our neck tight and our eyes shut and head just barely far enough back to was out the bottom of our hair.

I DON’T have the perspective in my life to see everything that is around me, I don’t see that it would be so much easier to trust and let someone else who can see everything help me out. But there is the risk of getting that soapy water in your eye… doesn’t seem like that big of a deal until you realize they LIE on the kids shampoo when they say it’s no tears

But still I sat there washing Gracie’s hair wondering where she ever got the fear that keeps her from letting go and leaning back… Something had to of happened in her life to make her realize that she could get hurt if she isn’t careful.

Even my 6 year old sister understands this so I have no doubt that you, reading this have figured out that life can hurt. But you still have to option to let other people in and to let you go of what you’re holding.

You see, if Gracie had just let me rinse her hair and she leaned back it would have lasted a lot less time than what we had to deal with…

I’m still learning this, I’ve gotten soapy water in my eye before and now because if it I’m a cautious person. G-d isn’t asking us to throw caution to the wind but He does want us to understand that we don’t always know how to get through things the “easy” way and sometimes if we’d just trust a good opinion we could make it faster.

I’m not sure if this will apply to everyone… but for today this is my art.

NOTE: I no longer have the irrational fear of getting sucked down the drain in the tub; give me a break I was 5 and homeschooled. I no longer have (much) issues with standing under running water to rinse out my hair… I haven’t gotten soap in my eye in a long time.  Shablam!

Obsessive Compulsive Details

I recently painted a mug at one of those places where you paint a pottery item and they fire them for you to seal on your artwork. It’s a pretty nice looking mug. I’d show you but it’s also a Christmas present for someone so I can’t exactly post a picture on here because they just might read this.

In which case, they now know they are getting a mug for Christmas.

I used 9 colors for this one mug.

It had a load of details etched into the sides and even the handle, so I took my time and made it look as awesome as the person getting it for Christmas.

When I first started on painting I was excited to get to all the cool ideas I had for each groove on the cup but as 1 ½ hours passed and I was still on the final, very tedious steps to complete the cup I began to lose patience. I wondered if the effort I was putting in would be appreciated or if they’d even realize how difficult it was to keep my hand steady for as long as I did. I began to want the world to understand how careful I was with my process and I wanted recognition.

This all came out in the form of me telling my mom over and over how freaking cool the mug was.

I wonder sometimes if G-d wants us to just notice. I wonder if while He was painting the colors of the trees if He thought, “Maybe if they see how much effort I’m putting into this for them they’ll appreciate me a little bit more”. I don’t think G-d NEEDS our appreciation for all of His works, but I do think He wants to tell us something. I think He might be telling us the story of how it always works out for the good of those who love Him and who are called according to His purposes because HIS purposes have already been established and we get to step into this pre-blessed work of good. I think that in the details He might be reminding us that HE is faithful and doesn’t get impatient in completing a good work that began in you. I feel like in the details, if we notice we might see a beauty about creation that can inspire awe and wonder around the things that He does and the person that He is. I feel like maybe we could learn a thing or two about beauty.

I’m so thankful that the Creator isn’t as sidetracked as I am. I’m thankful that He IS in this for the long haul and never grows weary of the tedious tasks of correcting, comforting, reminding and loving us. He raises the sun everyday and spins the earth into seasons. He forms something out of nothing on the daily and allows the smallest of faiths to move mountains. He is a G-d of the details and I feel like when I focus myself and my mind and sometimes my camera I find Him there.

((He is beautiful and I am paying attention.

Jesus I will trust You / I know You never fail / I will trust You / the only thing I know/ is G-d You’re in control/ in every little detail You are close / I’ll never be alone / here in the unknown / the power of Your presence fills my soul

Attitude Check

I reckon I still deal with this is many ways and in some other ones I just look back and laugh at myself. I have for sure had plenty of opportunity in these last 5 or so years to practice patience and see growth in that area of my life. I think I’m just finding that there is no ‘fix all’. It’s just a matter of waking up and needing Jesus.

Please enjoy this #ThinkBackThursday


I’ve found out something about myself tonight: I am not patient.

I’m in Georgia for Christmas and my cousin has been on a crocheting kick. I’ve known for a while how to do a simple chain stitch (for those who aren’t over 40 or weren’t homeschooled and don’t know what that is – it’s the simplest and most basic stitch you can crochet). For a short time I thought it was super interesting that one piece of yarn could end up making a full hat, scarf, or even blanket. I decided to expand my knowledge on this old-woman hobby and learn how to make a scarf. Except, my patience over break is low and I lost interest and ended up making a ring instead of sitting there for hours making a scarf.

Renee made a scarf. It looks nice.

I don’t like crocheting because while you’re in the process it doesn’t look like you’re accomplishing anything. I hate projects that don’t look like what they’re supposed to look like for a long time. Over this break I have also taken up the art or craft or need to make friendship bracelets (some of you will be getting these for Christmas… act surprised). While you’re in the process of making them they look NOTHING like what they are supposed to. I hate it. I didn’t like sitting there working on something that took forever and hardly looked the way it needed to in the end. In an expressive fit of exhaustion from not understanding how to make the dumb things I told my mom, “I hate things that don’t look right till they’re done!”

There is magic in hearing things out loud, or even paying attention to yourself.

I’ve been fighting this season in my life for a long time now. It’s been going on since probably around April, it got hard in June, and close to unbearable in September. I don’t like sitting in this place where I don’t feel I’m the person I’m supposed to be. I’m NOT good at enjoying the process of letting G-d take strand by strand; hook by hook; trial by trial; glory to glory and making me into something. And I have to be honest about this, at 20 years old that makes me sad.

I’m not sure why I didn’t just come out loving that part of life – the part where you are being built but I didn’t.

I do know that I am the only person who can change myself; more that I’m the only one who can let myself change. G-d does the changing. But sometimes He can’t change you if you don’t realize you need it. Somehow in the moment of wanting to quit on the bracelets and realizing that I had something wrong with me, deeply wrong with me I needed change.

((PFT, this was like an hour ago I NEED CHANGE G-D.))

Lord, please help me, I’m a 20 year old girl who needs an attitude check. I don’t want to be blind to the process and maybe there is even something inside of me that wants to ENJOY the process. But I know I can’t change that about myself alone, I NEED YOU.

            Bleh.

I’m in love with G-d and G-d’s in love with me. This is who I am, He’ll change me to who I need to be.